Thought process

Currently reading:  The Brother’s K

The mind is an amazing thing.  I often have my most interesting thoughts when I’m in the shower.  I wonder if other people find this to be true as well.  It’s a process that I go through the same way every morning (give or a take a few).  It takes very little active brain power so my mind is free to wander.  Also, there are very few distractions.  I’ve also found my mind tends to go on the strangest tangents with nothing to anchor it.

So this morning I was thinking about body hair.  My strong German roots make this something I think about more than I would like.  This lead me to think about tweezers because I have lost the pair I had once upon a time, and I’d like to start tweezing my eyebrows instead of getting them waxed.  Thinking of tweezers brought up the image of a particular pair with a red grip.  When I tried to place them I remembered buying a pair of tweezers from CVS while I was working at Maple City Market because a volunteer had gotten a sliver.  My next thoughts were about taking the splinter out, but then I remembered that it had been bitter cold that day.  I think it was the coldest day all winter actually, and as I walked to CVS without gloves on my hands, a woman pulled her car over and offered me an extra pair of gloves she had in her car.  I declined seeing as I wasn’t going far and wouldn’t really need them.  I thought about what a kind gesture that was, and how more people should be like that woman, and how I want to be more like that woman…. and then I thought about how I had gone from body hair to good samaritan in the span of a few moments.  And then I decided I had something to blog about.

Note about eyebrow waxing/plucking:  I used to think it was a completely silly vanity.  Then I had it done once because a beautician talked me into it.  and I was amazed at how much it opened up my face and made my eyes stand out more.  I’ve been hooked since.

I know I haven’t blogged much of substance recently.  I’m just not in a place to go into it.  There’s just too much.  But I’ve been really happy today!

Taming

The first Taming rehearsal where I needed to take blocking notes was tonight. (BTW, I’m stage managing Taming of the Shrew) It was hard to keep up, but I did it, and I’m proud of that!  I’m pretty sure I take good blocking notes too!  I can’t believe how fast we’re trying to put this together!!!

Goodnight

Ultimate

My team won tonight!  Yeah!  I shouldn’t be awake still.  I have to be in Middlebury at 7 tomorrow, but I’m right in the thick of Hell’s Kitchen season 5…. oh well.

Donnie Darko

I find that I decide to blog and get overwhelmed with everything that I could/should talk about.  But I’m going to talk about the movie I just watched.

Donnie Darko has been on my movie list for some time.  I finally had the oppertunity to watch it tonight.  The acting was wonderful.  I especially liked Drew Barrymore’s appropriately understated performance.   The cinematography was interesting and there was a beauty to the whole thing that I found interesting.  But I just could not engage in the story.  I didn’t really care for any of the characters enough to care about the film and the end sacrifice came too little late.  I think I’m too much like his girlfriend; I like when I see the beauty in the world.  I wish I hadn’t lost faith in it so early!  The sacrifice was beautiful.

Thursday Night Thoughts by Mrs. H

As part of my job, I’ve started going to a local church’s young adult group with one of my clients.  It’s a large church, conservative and for all intents and purposes, non-denom.  Last week was the first time I went.  The young adult pastor passed out scratch paper before his lesson and here’s what ended up on mine.

What is hell?    Seperation from God.

Why do people go to hell?…
I don’t believe it has anything to do with what we say.  Is it just about being a nice person?  No not really, but it’s not about a formula either.
It’s about having faith that there is more; faith that there is a creator and believing that living in harmony and pursuing peace and justice and LOVE is how we honor this creator.  And if we truly believe in a creator, how can we NOT praise this Being?
How can I not set aside part of my week to focus on this part of life?  No wonder I struggle so much with balance!  No wonder I always feel that I’m barely keeping my head above water.

(after the pastor read the end of the beatitudes, Blessed are the peacemakers…. and kind of dismissed the whole war and pacifism issue)
“Peacemakers show someone who is at war with God, how to be at peace with God”  Really?  hum, maybe, but I’m not comfortable with refocusiong that scripture.

(after the pastor claimed racism is built into us… trying to support the idea that we are sinful from birth)
Is racism biological at all?  I’ve always thought of it all completely as socialized.  I think it is socialized, but the cues are so subtle and pervasive that we don’t always see the cause.

God is NOT a man.  God is not limited to a masciline identity.  WHY then do we limit God by using the male pro-noun.

I don’t believe in the Old Testament as history.  It is the oral tradition of one people.  Are we really expected to not understand it as storytelling?  It doesn’t make it irrelevant, but seeing it as unaltered fact is not simply problematic, but dangerous, and we’ve seen how it can be used in awful, hurtful ways.

He totally pussyfooted around the issue of non-violence.  For shame.

“Evangelism by works or example is a small part of evangelism”?  Really?

Bible hopping bugs me.  He’s used 7+ passages a verse or two each.  context? cohesion?

With everything going on a teaching on “converting” is the most effective use of our time?  What about all the people who don’t have enough food right now, are losing their homes, power shut off, etc.  I know there’s a passage some where about meeting people’s physical needs before we can evangelize.  But I guess this is my first time, maybe that sermon was last week.

Pain

There’s nothing like a back injury to remind you how easily your body can break down.  On Thursday one of my thoracic vertebra slipped out of place.  It put enough pressure on my spinal nerves to cause numbness in my limbs, nausea, and difficulty focusing.  My dad (a doctor) was able to readjust it back into place, but it slipped out again in a couple hours and my dad had to adjust it again.  The pain in my back the last couple days has increased during the day from moderate to severe.  It’s hard to want to to do anything, and there’s so much I find I can’t do, or have difficulty doing.  I have to sleep on my back which is something I would normally never do so I’m not sleeping well either.

It’s been a wake up call that I need to address my back health issues.  I’ve had lumbar slips before that are painful and frustrating, but nothing like this.  My dad repeatedly tells me to exercise my back so that the muscles are strong enough to keep my spine in place, but I haven’t taken the time.  That needs to change.

I have call backs today for Taming.  The audition yesterday was my worst audition ever, so hopefully I can redeem myself today.

All moved in… sort of.

As some of you know, Mike and I just moved.  We moved across town and are now living with a friend of ours in his sizable house.  We we’ve been out of the old place for a week now, but we’re still not anywhere near settled in the new place.  Now while I realize that this perfectly normal, it’s still irksome.  But Mike and I both lead pretty busy lives, so it’s kind of been an hour here and an hour there trying to get things organized.  I have to keep reminding myself that Mike should have just as much say in where things go, and how things are decorated.  I have a tendancy to know what I want and assume that it the “right” way.

Also, I should be handing over the Assembly job in the next couple weeks!  I’m so excited.

Things to do:
taxes
meet with Elise to find a time for the musical I want to do this summer and work on getting the rights… or at least a quote for the rights
start putting together costumes for the next NWA show
prepare monologue for Taming of the Shrew
finish unpacking
take care of all the stuff in my trunk that belongs to other people, needs to go to the dry cleaner, or goodwill
go to the DMV
and… about a million other things

Poker

Mike and I were both at poker last night.  Mike won the first game, although I was a little pissy that he forced me all in on a mediocre hand.  But then I won the second game!  I’m still not sure how I did it, other than the fact that I was getting alot better hands than the first game.  And when it was down to two of us and we hit that “all in” point, I had pocket Aces (two aces in my hand for those of you who know as much about poker as I did about 3 months ago).  I don’t know that I’ll win again anytime soon, but it was a boost to the ego.

Random list

1.  I’ve been watching America’s Next Top Model all afternoon/evening

2.  One of the people I talk to the most during the week is a guy that I hadn’t talked to before he put up an interesting status on facebook and I was in an adventurous mood and messaged him.  We chat alot because we’re both the kind of people who’ll initiate.  It’s nice to not feel like I have to be the one to initiate.  I wish I talked to my good friends as much as I talk to him.

3.  I only have 2 jobs!  I’ve never been so happy about losing a job.

4.  I think I’m going to sell crocheted things at the bookstore.

5.  I think my favorite job this year has been at the bookstore.  I still miss it.

6.  I’ve started playing on-line poker on a regular basis and with friends once a week.  I’m kind of sporadic, but not that bad.

7.  I’ve also started playing darts, and was getting ok at it, but lately I’ve been terrible.

8.  I’ve discovered that I have an obsessive personality.

9.  I’ve also started eating compulsively when I’m stressed.

10.  I’m starting to enjoy my job alot more, but I still feel like I should be more proactive about finding ways to help my clients.

11.  The first guy I ever really dated has a baby now.  Woah!

12.  Mike and I are moving in a with a friend at the end of the month.  And Mike’s in the middle of a show.  Sigh.  That’s going to make things a little stressful.

13.  I’ve been dancing more recently and it makes me so happy!  Last night was contra and I loved it so much.

What questions would your best friend ask?

My very good friend Abby passed along an interview meme.

If you’d like to play along, just follow these instructions:
1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.”
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the
questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions. Be sure
you link back to the original post.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone
else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five
questions.

Ok, here goes

1. Looking back on your 25 years, what is one of the most difficult decisions you have ever had to make?

Wow, that’s a tough one right off the bat.  The one that comes to mind first was deciding to go to Goshen College.  I was in a serious relationship in Oregon and I didn’t know anyone who was going to Goshen.  I had some family in the Goshen area, but none that I was especially close to.  Luckily I definitely think I made the right choice.

2. Would you rather be limited to only comedic or dramatic roles for the rest of your life?

I think I’d have to go with comedic.  I’m better suited to them.  And I’m oddly drawn to dark comedies.

3. Would your rather be a marine biologist living in Florida or a midwife living in northern California?

I’m going to answer this question under the assumption that I’d be good at both jobs.  I think I’d have to go with being a midwife in NC.  Working with people is very important to me and I think I’d love being a midwife.  Also I don’t know anyone anywhere near Florida!  and if NC at least I’d be close to Oregon.  I also strangely have no desire to live in warmer climate USA.  I really have no idea why, because I love being warm.  I think it has to do with my love of the seasons.

4. How do you think your birth order impacts your personality?

I’m the baby of the family.  But at the same time, after the age of 8 I was the only kid at home.  I also started having nieces and nephews around the same time.  My sister, brother-in-law and their kids lived with us for a while when I was in middle school.  In some ways, and to varying degrees, I’ve experienced everything except middle child.  I have the confidence, and talkativness of a youngest child.  I think I also have a sense of entitlement that comes with being the youngest.  I think I also have the need to please that comes with being a youngest.  I have the independence that comes from being an only child.  I also have that wistful feeling that only children have when they hear people talk about being close to their siblings.  I don’t think I have very many “oldest” attributes, but I do feel protective toward my neices and nephews.
5. What inspires you to blog/not blog?

When I started blogging, I love the idea of sharing my story.  It became a habit.  Then I got busy with the wedding and multipule jobs and being married and I just didn’t feel the motivation as much.  I also found myself more and more intimidated by other blogs that I felt were well written.  Now, I think my friend’s blogs inspire me to want to blog.  But I still struggle to feel like I have something to stay.

Thanks Abby, love you too!