every once in a while (more frequently in the last few days) I check my ex-fiance’s facebook account or add his IM screen name to my list and read his away messages. I know this is a bad idea and distructive and I always feel shittier afterward. It’s such a compulsive thing. I don’t know exactly why I do it. I don’t know why I care what’s going on in his life. I had a dream about him last night, so that may have prompted it today, or maybe doing it recently prompted the dream, who knows. Am I looking for signs that he and Suzi aren’t doing well? I don’t really want them to be having problems, but if I’m being truly honest, there would be a part of me that was glad. I don’t think it has anything to do with me wishing them ill will. I think it’s because I still have trouble with the fact that he moved on so fast and that my absence from his life didn’t seem to make him unhappy. It makes me feel replaceable and unimportant. I’m fully aware that this is not true, but it doesn’t change the fact that I feel it.
But this is a self-intervention. You are all now my unwitting accountability partners. I will post every time I look him up, and the embarrassment of having to admit it publicly will be a deterrent (I hope).
Lady In Green 
hmm…i kind of do the same thing. good for you to do something about it!!
Thanks. I think many women have trouble letting go of the whole relationship after breaking up with a significant other. Just because we’re not dating anymore doesn’t stop you from caring about the person. But I also believe it is nearly impossible to remain friends after dating someone.
Stephanie:
I can totally relate to this kind of online stalking, and the dreams afterward.
But I think it only prolongs the letting go process, so I have to force myself to stop doing it. I have a feeling I do it because I am subconsciously hoping that he’ll come back, but that is next to impossible at this point in time.